Pure heaven

I visited the kids this past weekend. Let's just say it was pure heaven. It feels so good to go and ride the train on the way to see them, knowing that the next few days will be nothing but hanging out with the ones I love the most.

It took a while for the kids to warm up to me. I mean, it had been eight months since I'd seen them. I need to make a better effort to take the time to see them. I'd like to visit them once a month, if not more. I think I need a custody arrangement, or better yet, have them live with me all the time. I love them so much, and I have to make sure they know I'm in their lives.

We didn't do much in the way of exciting things -- we visited a pet store, went to the park, ate pizza in our hotel room and watched "Aladdin" and "Ratatouille." It felt good to watch the kids' cartoons again. It felt right. We also went and saw "Night at the Museum 2" at the cheap dollar theater. Good thing at this age the kids don't have much concept of money or what constitutes as "fun." They just loved being with Daddy.

And I loved being with them. It made me realize that I've been waiting so long for things to work out between me and Cherie -- and she's a lost soul, and until she finds herself, they won't. But the kids have a love that is unconditional and unquestioned. And I have to do my part every day to earn their love and trust. There will come a day -- and it could happen sooner than later -- where they will have every right to question where I was for long stretches of their lives. And two days with them, when they are older, won't soften the blow of not being there for them when they need it most.

Let's just suffice it to say that I will be riding that wave for a long time. We took pictures, and I made sure I gave the kids tons of hugs and kisses -- at that age, they don't mind -- and reminded them that Daddy loves them so much.

Perhaps they have been hearing the prayers I've been sending up each morning and each night. Perhaps they know more than I think they do.

I love you, Isaac and Savannah. Thank you for making Daddy a happy man again.